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Many conferences now days have poster presentations which are great for the
people attending but tiresome for the presenter. Follow these handy tips to
avoid the pain.
- Have a passport from some obscure country (e.g. Russia, Italy, China,
or Iraq).
- Even if rule 1 does not apply, still do not attend the conference at
which your paper is accepted.
- Arrange to
have dinner with a
big-shot when your poster is being presented.
- If your talk is refused an oral presentation, show your contempt by
simply not producing a poster.
- Just stick a photocopy of your paper up (preferably double sided).
People will forgive your non-attendance because all the information you
would have told them is readily available for them to read.
- Make an embarrassing poster. For example: use 5 pt font; print the
poster on separate A5 sheets (at least 40), do not number them, and
be sure to arrange them so it is unclear whether left-right precedence is
used or up-down precedence is used. Randomize the truth from conference
to conference. Give your poster a personal touch - draw it by
hand; photocopy your handwritten slides, or even better, put the slides
themselves up; use the word "fuzzy" in the title.
-
Be a big shot.
-
Collaborate with multiple co-authors
and say that you thought they were going to do the poster.
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